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Posted

It's clear what his problem is!

He has clearly not connected his computer to the Hyper Net!

To do this you must first wire your computer to a router via Ethernet cable. Now to get the right frequency to receive the signal at DARPA bend a metal coat hanger in a # pattern and attach it with a full roll of duct tape to the antenna. now you must coat the hanger in goat milk and bake it on using a hair drier.

Now you have the capability to receive a weak signal from the DARPA servers. This connection is insufficient however to download a pack so you must up the power!!!

To do this grab a car battery and you might need some extra wires. Now take the power supply cable of the router and cut it at the halfway point. Strip the wires and attach the car battery. Test if it is working by licking the cables. If you get a slight tingle in your tongue you have done everything so far right. Now plug that into the router and start up your computer. Once your computer is running search for "system 32". This is a program secretly installed to every computer to stop people from accessing the Hyper net.

You should now get a wifi network called "DARPA_ROX!!!". Connect to it and try downloading a pack. If everything was done right you should now be able to download all of the packs! Enjoy!

Posted

lukeb, u forgot tho menion how to install the Flux Capacitor, so he can connect to the past/future

Crap I did!!! To make sure you can download the pack without your connection timing out you must wire the Flux Capacitor to the back of your CPU with ribbon cable. This will warp time and instead of a 2 week download it should only be about 5 hours! Its blindingly fast once you do that!

Posted

And if you want to cut down the wait even further, you can always sacrifice a five-legged goat to dread Nylarhotep, the Crawling Chaos. (This does have the side effect of becoming one of his cultists, but don't worry, he like 'em sharp for various uses.)

Posted

And if you want to cut down the wait even further, you can always sacrifice a five-legged goat to dread Nylarhotep, the Crawling Chaos. (This does have the side effect of becoming one of his cultists, but don't worry, he like 'em sharp for various uses.)

You and your black magic sorts...of things... of things I don't know... Ummm... Idk why I'm still typing....

...

Posted

You're welcome. I believe it's your turn to bring the "virgin sacrifice" for each one of us to next week's nighttime shingding near the stone plinths? I'll bring the beer.

Posted

You're welcome. I believe it's your turn to bring the "virgin sacrifice" for each one of us to next week's nighttime shingding near the stone plinths? I'll bring the beer.

Good luck cutting me open.

On Topic: You are right! He must have gotten it working!

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