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Posted

You get a 1:99999999999999 scale fully functional model of an actual interstellar spacecraft. Its smaller than the worlds smallest violin.

I wish Australia didn't have such terrible internet.

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Posted

I wish I had my dinner already!

You had your dinner 2 hours ago. You're still hungry, and all the rest of your food mysteriously disappears.

I wish for a computer that never crashes.

Posted

Granted, but you are deported from Australia to Czechoslovakia, whose fibre optics the Aussies stole for their Internet; you're stuck on a dial-up line.

Holy ninja, Batman!

Granted, but the only wish you're allowed to make is for the end of all life in the universe.

I wish I had my original logo, without the "uber troll" on it, around.

Posted

You get your original logo, but then technic migrates to a new forum software and you lose it again.

I wish I could get out of Czechoslovakia and back to Australia with its (fictional) fast internet

Posted

You are teleported to Australia at the same moment that a clueless maintenance worker connects a high-voltage power line to their Internet cable and destroys the continent's Internet.

I wish I wished for a wish.

Posted

P.A.I.N.S. becomes a whole internet thing. It becomes so popular the FTB and Technic fanboys start slugging it out. all of the fights crash the servers. Because of bad fail safes, all of the fibre optic cables in America melt. At once. Enjoy your no-internet.

I wish I was back at home so I could play with my dogs.

Posted

You make a bowl of noodles and your pet snake eats it. Yum yum.

I wish for having smartness.

You're smart, your friends get jealous and you run out of friends. After this you make robot friends and they decide to take over the world and murder you.

I wish for starcraft 2 - Heart of the Swarm

Posted

It doesn’t ever end, but goes on, and on, and on, and oonnn- but then you play so long and push so much data through your computer that it eventually becomes self-aware, and decides that the best way to conquer the world would be through mass production of robotic pudding-eating monkeys. The massive pudding shortages spread throughout the globe, causing mass panic and mayhem to overthrow the world's governments. Except China. Which decides to take over the world for itself.

Four hundred years into the future, a Chinese scientist discovered the secret to the ultimate pudding. But controversy about the origins of the research lead to a deep-set division in the pudding research lab where the recipe originated, setting all of the employees on edge. Later that week, Sedrick stole my lunch, which, through one thing and another, eventually lead to a pudding balloon fight in the room with all of the computers that controlled the world's supply of radioactive 500-foot fire-breathing lizards. After Tokyo was destroyed thirty seven times in a single day, the rest of the world followed suit.

And all because you just HAD to have more Fallout.

Posted

You have one, but you will never be able to find 4 Diamonds big enough for making the energy crystals needed to craft an MFE so that you can charge it.

I wish for unlimited wi-..no.. I wish for an arbitrarily large but finite number of wi-... I wish for revocation of all rules prohibiting unlimited wis....no.

I wish for the power to see where any shortened URL goes without clicking.

Posted

You have one, but you will never be able to find 4 Diamonds big enough for making the energy crystals needed to craft an MFE so that you can charge it.

I wish for unlimited wi-..no.. I wish for an arbitrarily large but finite number of wi-... I wish for revocation of all rules prohibiting unlimited wis....no.

I wish for the power to see where any shortened URL goes without clicking.

you can now see the destination of the shortened URL in a small window, everybody starts sending you goatse links

i wish for all limitations put upon me to disapear

Posted

you can now talk to girls comfortably, but to your dismay, they are all now lesbians

i wish all minecraft mods were open source

(that's a repeated wish) they are all opensource, but are also shittily written

i wish for the ultimate power of everything

Posted

you are the president of the universe

the universe is your house

i wish adf.ly would die in a fire

ad.fly becomes a living entity and dies in a fire, however it does a freddy krueger and now haunts you in your dreams, attempting to murder you all the time

i wish my house was 100000000000000000000000000000000000 teraparsecs in diameter, and had all the features of a univers ( galaxies, solar systems, stars, planets e.t.c)

Posted

your house is that big, but now you have to deal with hans solo trying to cross it in 12 parsecs, and there is wookie shit everywhere

i wish blue was green

Wish granted. However, because the grass is green, you don't notice yourself walking off of a grassy cliff into the ocean. You drown.

I wish I could be the leaf.

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