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Corrupt-a-wish


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Aritchey, I don't corrupt your wish, thus corrupting your wish for a corrupted wish, thus fully granting your wish and not corrupting it, therefore corrupting it...

Attempting to resolve the above paradox, someone spams the entire Internet with text much like the above. It is now impossible to find anything useful.

I wish I had an avatar.

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You get a avatar but it gets you perm banned.

I wish I was not in school right now

Ahha! I have a snow day!

To actually corrupt it:

A giant robot from Japan comes to your school and destroys the roof of your school. You are now technicaly out doors. Classes are held normaly through the incedent and you go crazy and wake up in a mental hospital with blood all over you. No one tell you what happened and there are MPs guarding the door.

Damn it! Ninga'd!!!!!!!!!!

You get one but a certan hacker viking changes it to somthing awfull and you get perma banned.

I wish for a cookie.

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Your puppy destroys other people's stuff. They start a mob attack on you.

I wish I had some wishes ready to type in for this thread.

all the wishes you have pre-typed have already been made

i wish for the perfect fruitcake, that will not be stolen from me by anything/anyone, and will stop all the ninjas, other than me, in this thread

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You know someone who is a perfect fruitcake, or completely insane for the literal-minded.

I wish for some tasty Indian food for lunch.

Edit: No one? Please don't make me corrupt this myself...

the indian food turns out to contain 90% cat vomit

i wish that i could ride my bike with no handkebars

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All your reading comprehension skill is transformed into spelling skill. You now seem like a complete idiot.

I wish the Tekkit server I was playing on would come back up.

You are offered a position on my server!

Thats not corrupted though...

The server comes back up but the owner reset the world. Have fun!

I wish for a driveway that would shovel itself!

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Your driveway shovels all the snow off itself and onto your roof, which caves in.

I wish for a bit of snow where I live.

"bit" is extremely vague, so you get covered in snow that reaches the outer edges of our atmosphere

i wish for the abillity to ride a bike that has no handlebars well

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congratulations, you are the proud owner of 1lb of weapons grade plutonium. you are arrested by the CIA and proceed to die in prison of acute radiation poisoning

i wish my computer wasnt so damn noisy

You no longer have a computer

I wish I was immune to any form of radiation poisoning

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Your recursive wish does not approach a base case, so it uses up all the computation power in the world. The only computers spared are those too primitive to attach to any networks, ever. The world discovers that there is not one game that can run on ENIAC. RIP computer gaming 1951-2013.

I wish I had a cake.

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